Monday, 17 October 2011

Throne of Skulls - An Observers Overview (and a bit of a Rant).


So this weekend I acted as team Remembrancer so the rest of the guys could get on with the business of playing games while I did all the real work chronicling it all for them.....

Before I get to the bits that you all actually want to see like the best painted armies and the actual games I thought I'd warm-up with a brief overview of the event.

Venue.


Well you can't really complain much about this really. There was enough room between tables to move around which is an issue I've had at other locations and much as I admire and respect my fellow competitors I'd rather not rub my buttocks against the ones playing behind me for two fucking hours, lol. The bar was well stocked with both food and beverages and it was actually possible to order drinks from the bar without leaving your gaming table via several helpful staff who were wandering around. For those of you who are involved in this hobby in any way and have not ever been there then I can whole-heartedly recommend Warhammer World as a gaming venue.

Organisation.
Pretty damn good actually. It was possible to register the night before if you so desired in order to avoid the queueing in the morning but to be honest you had plenty of time regardless.
As the tournament started before the in venue Games Workshop store had opened there was a table set up where competitors could purchase dice, tapes, templates and codices should they have been daft enough to forget such essential gaming components, lol. There was also a Black Library stand set up which had some books available before their official release dates and there were also a couple of authors there signing their own works (I forget which ones they were for which I apologise).
Everything seemed to happen on schedule and the instructions were generally clear and precise with the only exception being that the announcer marked one mission type on the sign and said the name of another for the first game which did create a little confusion, but other than that minor oversight everything seemed to go rather well. There seemed to be enough judges in shouting and/or fetching distance and (at least the ones I saw or heard) seemed to give accurate and sensible answers to any queries.

Refreshments.
As I mentioned earlier, it was possible to get drinks brought to your table which was a nice touch as long as you didn't mind drinking from plastic rather than glass (a sensible precaution I suppose given the disruption that an exploding glass could have caused). I'm told the food was adequate if not exactly exciting but as I wasn't playing and therefore didn't get a free meal I ate in the bar which was (I'm told) of a much higher quality.

The Competitive Bit.
The scoring system was rubbish from the point of view of a competitive gamer. The scoring was three points for a win, one for a draw and nothing for a loss (fine so far) with each player having a vote for 'Favourite Army' which they could give to one of their five opponents of the day (open to abuse in my opinion) which would be added to the total at the end. Victory points were not recorded which I think was an error on their part but then again if your definition of 'fun' isn't the same as Jervis Johnsons then that's apparently just bad luck for you.

Now for the really annoying part.....the overall score of each player was compared to that of any other player using the same race (so Blood Angels with Blood Angels, Eldar with Eldar, etc.) and each race had a winner based on their comparative score.....then the 'winner' of each races 'Margin of Victory' was compared in order to find an overall winner. To make matters worse in the event of a draw (common considering there where no VP's recorded) the winner was decided in some cases by whose army list looked the best* and in other cases by who had the most 'Favourite Army' votes. This blatantly ridiculous system resulted in one out of the four Necron players doing a lot better than then other three and subsequently becoming overall winner.

* I have nothing against having a 'Best Army List' prize, in fact one of my friends won it to be honest but I don't think it should be used as a fucking tie-breaker.

So with that lot in mind I decided to work out who actually bloody won. Having no VP's to use to divide up the people who tied on points I have been forced to use the 'Favourite Army' votes to distinguish between those with equal scores. I have prioritised the win/lose/draw scores over the favourite army votes however as I think winning games is more important than the fact that five people liked you more then the four other people that they played. Even doing it this way there were a lot of ties and I've also had to presume that the numbers provided by GW were actually correct...

So without further preamble,



THRONE OF SKULLS 15-16/10/2011: ACTUAL WINNER























      GAME


FAV. ARMY


NAME
ARMY
1
2
3
4
5

VOTES
OVERALL
1
ANTHONY CHEW
ORKS
3
3
3
3
3
15
3
18
2
LEONIDAS LASKARIDIS
TAU EMPIRE
3
3
3
3
3
15
1
16
2
MIKE BROWN
ORKS
3
3
3
3
3
15
1
16
3
MATT LEWIS
DARK ELDAR
3
3
1
3
3
13
3
16
4
CHRIS WHITIKER
DARK ELDAR
3
3
0
3
3
12
3
15
4
DALE TRANTOR
ELDAR
3
3
0
3
3
12
3
15
4
DAN OLDFIELD
SISTERS OF BATTLE
3
3
3
0
3
12
3
15
4
LEE ELLIS-HALL
DARK ELDAR
3
3
3
0
3
12
3
15
6
DEMETRIUS TAMPAKOUDIS
BLOOD ANGELS
1
3
3
3
0
10
5
15
7
ALEX FAWCETT
NECRONS
3
3
1
3
3
13
1
14
7
LIAM O'SHEA
ELDAR
1
3
3
3
3
13
1
14
8
MATTHEW MUSCETT
ORKS
0
3
3
3
0
9
5
14
9
ALLEN EL-SOUR
SPACE WOLVES
3
3
3
0
3
12
1
13
9
DAVID RICHARDSON
ORKS
3
3
3
3
0
12
1
13
9
GRANT RENNIE
GREY KNIGHTS
3
3
3
3
0
12
1
13
9
RUSSEL HODGE
DARK ELDAR
0
3
3
3
3
12
1
13
9
SEAN MORRIS
CHAOS MARINES
3
3
0
3
3
12
1
13
10
ALEX YOUNG
ORKS
1
0
3
3
3
10
3
13
10
RYAN STEVENSON
DARK ANGELS
3
3
3
0
1
10
3
13
10
WILL WILSON
BLOOD ANGELS
3
3
1
3
0
10
3
13











...
For those of you who are interested the tournament winner would actually have been joint seventh if I was doing the results which means that guy is probably overjoyed that I'm not. However the Ork player who won all his games and got more points that anybody else might have been a bit happier.....The only two anomalies are the guys with five favourite Army votes who would have been a lot lower in the (well my) rankings without them.

I'm now off to compile the 527 pictures I took into appropriate folders ready for the next few articles on the event...wish me luck then....

Thoughts and comments are (as usual) most welcome.


Friday, 14 October 2011

Road Trip to Warhammer World


A large number of my friends and acquaintances are off to play in the Throne of Skulls tournament at Nottingham this weekend. I have decided to act as 'team' photographer as firstly it's a good excuse to go and secondly it should mean I've got Blog posts for the next couple of weeks without putting a lot of effort in other than compiling photos into appropriate sub sections ;-)

Of course the downside to this is that it won't be practical for me to do blog posts this weekend.....I will however try to post some status updates (and perhaps the odd picture) on the Gmorts Chaotica Facebook page in order to keep you going.

Hopefully I'll have time to have a mooch about as well ;-)

To anybody who I only know as a cool internet name who happens to be going to this event I'll periodically hold my arms in the air for no apparent reason so I at least look a bit like the picture in the corner of my blog page. That way you can say hello or just ignore me completely depending on how you feel at the time...


Bye till after the weekend then.....

Thursday, 13 October 2011

E-Mail In : Blood Angels 'Jumper' List.

She's got angel wings and is in some blood therefore this picture is totally relevant to this article.....
E-Mail In :

Hi GMort,

I've been using  a jump pack BA list for a few months now but it's not working very well. I've got plenty of Melta for dealing with tanks and Flamers for killing infantry. I also had some trouble with getting shot to bits before I could do anything so I added some vanguard units but they've been really disappointing for the points I've had to spend on them, there main job is to remove bubblewrap but they don't seem to manage it often and I hardly ever manage to destroy vehicles with them (which is their primary role really) so you can ditch them if you like. I thought 50 Marines would be loads even at 2000 points but I'm losing more games than I'm winning and to be honest even the wins have felt like they happened by accident, lol. You seem to give good advice without being a cunt about it so I thought I'd drop you this e-mail. To make matters worse I want to use it in a 1750 point tournament in my local area and I've a horrible feeling that it will suck even worse at that points value. Is the list beyond hope or can something be salvaged from it?

Reply :

I've converted your list into Army Builder so I could play around with it more easily. I'll post your list first so I can point out some (imo) mistakes you've made and then I'll post a list taking all that stuff into account (including your new points value requirement). 

2000 Pts - Blood Angels Roster

HQ: Captain in Power Armour (1#, 160 pts)
   1 Captain in Power Armour @ 160 pts (Jump Pack; Combi-Meltagun x1; Power Fist x1)

I'm reasonably sure that this Captain isn't bringing a lot to your list. The Power Fist loses you the Initiative advantage of the Captain and that's a lot of points to spend just for an extra Melta shot. If you really want an Honor Guard then you can still have one if we leave in the Librarian which I'm going to recommend you do.

: Honour Guard (5#, 200 pts)
   1 Honour Guard @ 200 pts (Equip with Jump Packs; Blood Champion; Honour Guard)
      1 Blood Champion (Jump Pack)
      1 Sanguinary Novitiate (Jump Pack)
      3 Honour Guard (Jump Pack; Flamer x1)

A Flamer equipped Honour Guard is okay if your using Dante to 'place' the unit wherever you want when it drops to clear out objective holding units. Other than that it's going to draw all the fire-power of an infantry list and be laughed at by a mechanised one. If you want to use an Honour Guard in this way then it's best to give it Meltaguns and Flamers so it'd dual purpose.

HQ: Librarian in Power Armour (1#, 140 pts)
   1 Librarian in Power Armour @ 140 pts (Jump Pack; Infernus Pistol; Blood Lance; Fear of the Darkness)

The powers are fine, not sure about the Infernus Pistol though.

Elite: Sanguinary Priest (3#, 255 pts)
   1 Sanguinary Priest @ 255 pts (Sanguinary Priest in Power Armour)
      3 Sanguinary Priest in Power Armour (Jump Pack; Combi-Meltagun)

I'm presuming that one of these goes with each Assault Squad and it's equipped this way to give the unit dual-melta. Personally I'd rather give them a Power Weapon of some kind as they are WS 5. If they're with the Assault Squad anyway then it's unlikely that they can avoid combat so they might as well help out.

Troops: Assault Squad (10#, 235 pts)
   7 Assault Squad @ 235 pts (Meltagun; Flamer)
      1 Assault Marine with Meltagun
      1 Assault Marine with Flamer
      1 Sergeant (Lightning Claw x2)

Troops: Assault Squad (10#, 235 pts)
   7 Assault Squad @ 235 pts (Meltagun; Flamer)
      1 Assault Marine with Meltagun
      1 Assault Marine with Flamer
      1 Sergeant (Lightning Claw x2)

Troops: Assault Squad (10#, 235 pts)
   7 Assault Squad @ 235 pts (Meltagun; Flamer)
      1 Assault Marine with Meltagun
      1 Assault Marine with Flamer
      1 Sergeant (Lightning Claw x2)

Sergeants need Power Fists. Unit needs two Meltaguns.

Fast Attack: Vanguard Veteran Squad (5#, 270 pts)
   1 Vanguard Veteran Squad @ 270 pts (Equip with Jump Packs; Vanguard Veteran; Vanguard Veteran)
      1 Sergeant (Jump Pack; Melta Bombs; Power Fist)
      1 Vanguard Veteran (Jump Pack; Melta Bombs; Bolt Pistol; Power Fist x1)
      3 Vanguard Veteran (Jump Pack; Melta Bombs; Bolt Pistol; Power Weapon x1)

Fast Attack: Vanguard Veteran Squad (5#, 270 pts)
   1 Vanguard Veteran Squad @ 270 pts (Equip with Jump Packs; Vanguard Veteran; Vanguard Veteran)
      1 Sergeant (Jump Pack; Melta Bombs; Power Fist)
      1 Vanguard Veteran (Jump Pack; Melta Bombs; Bolt Pistol; Power Fist x1)
      3 Vanguard Veteran (Jump Pack; Melta Bombs; Bolt Pistol; Power Weapon x1)

These are very expensive for what they do. If (as you say in your e-mail) your using them to destroy vehicles then a small 'suicide' Assault Squad would do the job for a lot less points and could also double as a moving cover save for your larger more important squads as well as being a cheap 'drop on an objective while scoring' unit. So I am indeed going to 'ditch' them, lol.

Total Roster Cost: 2000

To be honest I can actually quite easily turn that into a 1750 list using the changes I've mentioned.

1750 Pts - Blood Angels Roster

HQ: Librarian in Power Armour (1#, 140 pts)
   1 Librarian in Power Armour @ 140 pts (Jump Pack; Infernus Pistol; Blood Lance; Fear of the Darkness)

: Honour Guard (5#, 225 pts)
   1 Honour Guard @ 225 pts (Equip with Jump Packs; Honour Guard)
      1 Sanguinary Novitiate (Jump Pack)
      4 Honour Guard (Jump Pack; Flamer x1; Meltagun x1)

Elite: Sanguinary Priest (3#, 270 pts)
   1 Sanguinary Priest @ 270 pts (Sanguinary Priest in Power Armour)
      3 Sanguinary Priest in Power Armour (Jump Pack; Lightning Claw)

Troops: Assault Squad (10#, 245 pts)
   7 Assault Squad @ 245 pts (Meltagun; Meltagun)
      1 Assault Marine with Meltagun
      1 Assault Marine with Meltagun
      1 Sergeant (Hand Flamer x1; Power Fist x1)

Troops: Assault Squad (10#, 245 pts)
   7 Assault Squad @ 245 pts (Meltagun; Meltagun)
      1 Assault Marine with Meltagun
      1 Assault Marine with Meltagun
      1 Sergeant (Hand Flamer x1; Power Fist x1)

Troops: Assault Squad (10#, 245 pts)
   7 Assault Squad @ 245 pts (Meltagun; Meltagun)
      1 Assault Marine with Meltagun
      1 Assault Marine with Meltagun
      1 Sergeant (Hand Flamer x1; Power Fist x1)

Troops: Assault Squad (5#, 125 pts)
   3 Assault Squad @ 125 pts (Meltagun)
      1 Assault Marine with Meltagun
      1 Sergeant (Bolt Pistol; Infernus Pistol x1)

Troops: Assault Squad (5#, 125 pts)
   3 Assault Squad @ 125 pts (Meltagun)
      1 Assault Marine with Meltagun
      1 Sergeant (Bolt Pistol; Infernus Pistol x1)

Troops: Assault Squad (5#, 125 pts)
   3 Assault Squad @ 125 pts (Meltagun)
      1 Assault Marine with Meltagun
      1 Sergeant (Bolt Pistol; Infernus Pistol x1)

Total Roster Cost: 1745

I'll be interested to hear how you do in your tournament as list feedback is always nice to have.

Thoughts and comments are (as usual) most welcome.

Wednesday, 12 October 2011

Deathwatch - Brother Mortis's Continuing Adventures...

Well we've been playing Deathwatch pretty much every Saturday for months now so our characters have all come on a long way. We usually spend the whole day at it so we get some fairly substantial missions done.

Over recent months we've captured a Chaos Ship, Cleared a planet of Chaos taint,  Wiped out a Hive Fleet, Cleansed a Space Hulk of Orks (part of which used to be an Imperial Fist Star Fort so we managed to get them some of their relics back as well) and most recently we've had to help out one of the Imperial Fist Strike Cruisers that had come for the aforementioned relics when some followers of Nurgle managed to sneak aboard the vessel using methods that were never really explained adequately.....

What do you mean, I don't look like an Imperial Fist.....

Rather amusingly the leader of the Plague Marines was a former member of our kill-team that we'd presumed had simply returned to his own Chapter. Well as an Imperial Fist I suppose he sort of had.....just not in the way we thought. I'm now eagerly awaiting all the other 'guests' we've had start reappearing in various ways.....No wonder we've got a fucking Chaplain attached to the team now, lol.

The team now consists of a Librarian and a Devastator (the only original characters remaining), A Black Shield Apothecary, My Techmarine (not technically an original member as they'd already done a single session when I started), a Chaplain and a 'Keeper' NPC who's controlled by our GM. We've also had a few 'guest appearances' from other friends for one or two missions but they usually die heroically the next session when our GM gets bored of controlling them on the absent players behalf.


Brother Mortis is now mostly augmented bionics rather than flesh though some organic components do remain. I also had to slightly alter his character model to take into account his 'Signature Wargear' Storm Bolter,


Of course with all the extra hardware he has now, I'm working on a completely new model to represent him and as I'm only 75 XP away from being able to take the 'Forge Master' advanced speciality which gives me Artificer armour, a Servo Harness and a Power Axe* I'll need to add all that stuff as well.

* For some reason the Forge Master only gets a standard Power Axe rather than the far more appropriate Omnissiah Axe. I may have to start negotiating with my GM about that....

My GM has also started insisting on quite detailed reasons for anything other than bog standard upgrades and equipment which forces me to write stuff like this,

"Brother Mortis held his detached forearm in place with his Servo Arm and carefully reattached the neuro connections and servo actuators that joined it to the upper part of his bionic left limb. Once the connections were completed he ran through the sacred rituals of blessing in order to placate the Machine Spirits within. His limb had been designed specifically with this upgrade in mind so it had taken almost no time at all to complete the integration, besides which the enhancements themselves were well known by the Techpriests of a dozen Forge Worlds so the necessary rituals and blessings were freely available (to those initiated in the ways of the Omnissiah at least) and relatively simple to apply...

The Firing Ranges and training areas were almost completely empty as most of the Deathwatch Marines on board were preparing to deal with the recently encountered Space Hulk in one way or another. Mortis activated a combat Servitor and prepared for his newest systems first true test run.

The close combat equipped Servitor jerked clumsily into life and began to advance towards the Battle Brother in front of it, it's simple system programmed with a single purpose.....destruction.....whether it's own or that of it's target however meant nothing to it.....

With the speed of pure thought Mortis activated the weapon now integrated into his left forearm and there was a satisfying mechanical hiss as the firing port in the palm opened up and the unmistakable barrel of a Bolt Pistol slid into place through its carefully aligned counterpart in the Armoured Glove of the Marine's Power Armour. Targeting systems in his helm aligned perfectly with the direction of his outstretched arm and a burst of explosive shells hurtled towards the mindless automaton destroying much of it's armour plating. A second and a third burst tore into the unit at various locations but none of them were particularly critical. Of course had Brother Mortis intended it's destruction then it would now be little more than scrap but then that meant his other new addition could not be tested...

The bulky barrel of the Bolt weapon retracted into it's housing at the same time as a blade slid smoothly from the back of Mortis's other Arm and locked into place, Power flowed from his Potentia Coil through specially designed connections in the blades killing edges. Though having nowhere near the penetrative power of a true Power Weapon it nevertheless increased it's killing power by a satisfying margin. Belying his tremendous bulk Mortis avoided the first swing of the servitors Power Fist having calculated it's most likely direction of attack with startling speed and accuracy and drove his Blade through the gap created by the Bolt rounds and into a vital system in the drones chest...Genetically and Bionically enhanced muscles tore the weapon sideways through the doomed Servitors primary cables and power core before decapitating it with a brutal back-swing. The Techmarine watched impassively as the broken and headless machine fell in a shattered heap on the floor.

The test had been the expected success, both his Bolt Pistol and Combat Blade were now fully integrated into his enhanced form and as an added bonus he no longer needed to think about where to carry them....."

Just to get a couple of Bionics that I'm only taking for 'Fluff' reasons anyway, lol.

As soon as I've made some progress with the new model I'll post some pictures but as I'm off to act as team photographer for a number of people going to the Throne of Skulls tournament in Nottingham this weekend it's unlikely that we'll get any actual Deathwatch done for a couple of weeks. Though on the bright side this means that you'll all have lots of pretty pictures to look at next week ;-)

Warhammer Forge Newsletter 14

http://www.forgeworld.co.uk/SiteImages/fw-wh-logo.png 
Warhammer Forge Newsletter # 14



Hi there,
            It’s been a busy start to October here at Forge World, and we’d first like to thank everyone who came to see us at the Games Days held recently in both the UK and Australia. Continuing the Games Day theme, this week’s newsletter announces the release of two jaw-droppingly detailed models first available at Games Day UK: the Vampire Counts Battle Standard Bearer and the Incarnate Elemental of Beasts.
Vampire Counts Wight King Battle Standard Bearer
Wight King Standard BearerThe first of this week’s new releases is another amazing resin character model designed by the talented Edgar Skomorowski. Marching implacably forth from the benighted land of Sylvania, encrusted with grave-dirt and swathed in the ragged and tarnished wargear of a bygone age, this long-dead Wight King has been raised from the grave by arcane and unhallowed magics.
Such a horror is a common sight among the ranks of the Undead, and these fell warriors are often entrusted with the standard of their loathsome master, guarding the tattered colours with nerveless skill and a sharp blade. The Drakenhof Banner that this resin Vampire Counts Wight King Battle Standard Bearer carries is packed with incredible detail, and the model is available to order now for immediate despatch.

Incarnate Elemental of Beasts
Incarnate Elemental of BeastsKnown in legend as the Bloody Hidesman, the Horned Man or the Faceless Hunter, the Incarnate Elemental of Beasts can only be summoned through savage and secret rites all but unknown outside the Amber College and the hellish Bray-Shamans of the hordes of mutant beasts that skulk in the dark places of the world. It is a towering, half-human figure that embodies the ferocity and merciless hunger of the wild, a mortal form binding the turbulent spirits of numberless predators.
The masters of the hidden Lore of Ghur speak of bloody rituals performed before a great idol of beast skulls and dripping, flensed skins, and the terrible price to be paid for the service of the Bloody Hidesman. Yet such is the dire need in these endless days of war that engulf the world that the power of the Incarnate Elemental of Beasts is often required.
The Incarnate Elemental of Beasts, designed by Keith Robertson, is a base and brutal servant-form, created to defend an Amber Wizard and destroy his foes. This highly detailed and immense full resin monster is the perfect centrepiece for any army. It is available to order now for immediate despatch, and experimental rules for this fell creature can be downloaded from the Forge World website.

Games Day Italy
Forge World’s intrepid team will soon be heading to Modena for Games Day Italy on the 16th October. If you’ve placed a reservation order, you will now have received a confirmation e-mail containing your order number, details of anything we’ve been unable to reserve, and a total cost in Euros payable upon collection.
We’ll see you at the Forum Guido Monzani!
Thanks,
Ead Brown
Customer Service Manager

Tuesday, 11 October 2011

House of Paincakes Article No.39ish

Article can be found here. Not many comments at the moment but that's probably because I didn't use the word 'Fuck' as often as I normally do, lol.

I'm beginning to run out of ideas for Tuesday Eye-Candy and was going to abandon the feature completely due to the lack of inspiration. However Inspiration did indeed come....While flicking through various TV channels I noticed that all female cops or FBI, NCIS, CIA, etc. agents in TV series seem to be incredibly hot babes for no apparently discernible plot related reason. Though I'm not complaining about it particularly it does seem a bit unlikely that this many sex goddesses would chooses a career in law enforcement.....

Lets start with NCIS and it's 'spin-off' NCIS:LA for this week shall we?

Sasha Alexander,




Cote de Pablo,



Daniela Ruah,




They even had a hot boss at one point in the form of Lauren Holly,


Even the forensics goth chick is strangely attractive,



That's enough for this week.....enjoy ;-)

Monday, 10 October 2011

Forge World Newsletter 285

 Forge World Newsletter #285


Hi there,
            We have two new exciting releases to announce, the mighty Dark Eldar Tantalus and the Imperial Emplacement hollow resin terrain piece.
            
Dark Eldar Tantalus
Dark Eldar TantalusFirst crafted, so it is said, for the Archon Surasis Grief of the Kabal of the Dark Mirror, the Tantalus is an assault skimmer, somewhat larger and more complex in design than the Raider, and accordingly better armed. Its distinctive twin-hulled design houses powerful engine-reactors slaved to enhanced drives and its unique scythevane armament.
One of the largest Dark Eldar vehicles yet encountered by the Imperial war machine, the cruel reavers who crew this sleek engine of destruction take delight in mounting high-speed attacks, slicing through the hulls of enemy vehicles and rending infantry into crimson shreds, heralded by the screech of the molecular dissonance fields of its scythevanes and the rapid fire of its pulse-disintegrator armament.
The Dark Eldar Tantalus, designed by Daren Parrwood, is a detailed full resin kit that includes a set of etched brass deck panels. Measuring nearly 11” from prow to stern, this twin-hulled vehicle is a great addition to any Dark Eldar army. With its full rules contained Imperial Armour Apocalypse Second Edition, the Tantalus is available now for immediate release.
Imperial EmplacementImperial EmplacementAdding to our new range of hollow resin scenery is the Imperial Emplacement, designed by
. This detailed free-standing terrain piece has been designed as a dug-in position for almost any size of Warhammer 40,000 vehicle, from Chimeras and Leman Russ to Macharius and Malcador-based super heavy tanks. The Imperial Emplacement features a wealth of detail such as ammunition stowage, unexploded munitions, a targeting cogitator and an observer’s position. The base of the Imperial Emplacement has been reinforced with trench plates to act as duckboards, and the scenery piece also features plenty of space for crew models as well as vehicles.
Ideal for use as both a gaming piece to fight battles over or the basis of a detailed diorama, the Imperial Emplacement is available to order now for immediate despatch.
Games Day Italy 
A huge selection of the 
Warhammer Forge and Forge World ranges will be available from the Forge World stand at Games Day Italy, which will be held on 16th October at the Forum Guido Monzani in Modena. Both our 2011 Event Only MkIII Boarding Space Marine and Chaos Dwarf Hellsmith models will be on sale.
If you have placed a reservation for Games Day Italy, you’ll soon be receiving a confirmation e-mail with your order number, details of any items we’ve been unable to reserve, and a total cost in € payable on the day.
For full details of pricing at the event you can download a pdf copy of our updated 2011 Forge World catalogue and brand new Warhammer Forge catalogue.

Thanks,
Ead Brown
Customer Service Manager
Forge World

House of Paincakes 'Hop Idol' - Update.

Editors Note - This article is now completely redundant due to this announcement right here,


http://www.houseofpaincakes.com/2011/10/important-hop-idol-update.html


However you can just look at the Mila Kunis picture if you like as that should always be relevant for reasons that I'm sure I don't need to explain, lol.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

For those of you who haven't been paying attention, the Blog Network I've been writing articles for every Tuesday has recently held a competition to find a new writer. There have been various different tasks for the competitors but the most recent was for each of the remaining five to interview an existing author.

Links to the interviews can be found here.

If you have a minute or two spare go and have a read through them all and then vote on which four you think are the best (the actual poll is in the top right hand corner of the blog itself).

I'm obviously slightly biased towards Lantz's interview as he interviewed me and if he doesn't get through that obviously means that I'm boring and therefore would most likely have to stop blogging forever due to the disappointment and shame. It also had a picture of Mila Kunis in it which imo automatically gives it bonus points.

It wasn't actually this picture.....but I happen to like this one ;-)

Also one of the guys (HotPanda) interviewed himself rather than the author he was assigned which I'm inclined to think means he shouldn't get through due to the fact that he didn't actually do what he was asked as well as having the slight advantage of being able to make his interview flow better due to having advance notice of the answers. Of course that's just my opinion, lol.

So give the interviews a read and cast your votes as you see fit*

* As long as at least one of them is a vote for Lantz ;-)

Friday, 7 October 2011

E-Mail In : World Eaters Request.

Editors Note : Due to a recent issue somebody had with a blog post (Its a long story that I wont bore you with) I am no longer going to put names at the bottom of 'e-mails in' unless I'm specifically asked to leave it in by the original sender.


E-Mail In :

Hello Gmort,


I know your not a fan of the Chaos Codex but I like to use the right codex for an army if it exists so I'd like to use it to make a Khorne themed army. I know you use Kharn in your Chaos lists sometimes so I thought you'd be the best person to ask. I also figured I'd be more likely to get an answer from you than waiting an eternity for one of the other blogs to answer me or to have Stelek tell me I'm a fucking idiot for even trying it. So I want the army to be mainly Khorne Zerkers and I don't really want to many oddball things like Obliterators in it that are meant to be rare rather than there being about 20 of the sods hanging around with every Chaos warband consisting of more than two guys. I'm also not sure about using Dreadnoughts because of the whole 'turn around and shoot your own guys' thingy. I don't care about winning every game but I'd rather not lose every game if you know what I mean, lol. 


Oh and I'd like a 2000 point list if you don't mind.

Reply :

Okay a few points you raised need clarifying before we get started.

1) Themed lists have problems from the start unless it's a theme around something effective and the Chaos Codex itself isn't very well balanced in that regard. However saying that if your willing to put the time into learning an army thoroughly then you can succeed with almost anything. But be warned that an experienced player with an optimised list from a decent codex is still going to kick the shit out of you.

2) As you say in your e-mail, from a 'fluff' point of view having access to three Obliterator cults is a tad unlikely outside of an Iron Warriors force. A single cult is still a possibility though so I reserve the right to include at least one as a Heavy Support choice.

3) Chaos Dreadnoughts shoot the nearest visible unit, not the nearest unit which is an important distinction and vehicle weapon fire arcs are well defined in the rule book. I already covered the issue a long time ago in this blog post right here so I'm not going into it again. For those of you who don't agree with my interpretation feel free to point me to an official GW Errata that tells me I'm wrong.....he's a clue....there isn't one ;-)

Here's an army list with the usual caveats of 'Themed Lists are rarely optimisable' and 'The Chaos Codex sucks'....


2000 Pts - Chaos Marines Roster - Berzerker Themed List

HQ: Kharn the Betrayer (1#, 165 pts)
   1 Kharn the Betrayer @ 165 pts

: Summoned Lesser Daemon (6#, 78 pts)
   6 Summoned Lesser Daemon @ 78 pts

Elite: Dreadnought (1#, 100 pts)
   1 Dreadnought @ 100 pts (Multi-melta)

Elite: Dreadnought (1#, 100 pts)
   1 Dreadnought @ 100 pts (Multi-melta)

Elite: Dreadnought (1#, 100 pts)
   1 Dreadnought @ 100 pts (Multi-melta)

Troops: Khorne Berzerkers (8#, 232 pts)
   6 Khorne Berzerkers @ 232 pts (Rhino)
      1 Skull Champion (Power Fist)
      1 Rhino (Twin-Linked Bolter; Combi-melta)

Troops: Khorne Berzerkers (9#, 253 pts)
   7 Khorne Berzerkers @ 253 pts (Rhino)
      1 Skull Champion (Power Fist)
      1 Rhino (Twin-Linked Bolter; Combi-melta)

Troops: Khorne Berzerkers (9#, 253 pts)
   7 Khorne Berzerkers @ 253 pts (Rhino)
      1 Skull Champion (Power Fist)
      1 Rhino (Twin-Linked Bolter; Combi-melta)

Troops: Khorne Berzerkers (9#, 253 pts)
   7 Khorne Berzerkers @ 253 pts (Rhino)
      1 Skull Champion (Power Fist)
      1 Rhino (Twin-Linked Bolter; Combi-melta)

Heavy Support: Predator (1#, 115 pts)
   1 Predator @ 115 pts (Searchlight; Smoke Launchers; Autocannon; Heavy Bolter; Havoc Launcher)

Heavy Support: Predator (1#, 115 pts)
   1 Predator @ 115 pts (Searchlight; Smoke Launchers; Autocannon; Heavy Bolter; Havoc Launcher)

Heavy Support: Obliterators (3#, 225 pts)
   3 Obliterators @ 225 pts

Total Roster Cost: 1989

7 Melta weapons (though 4 of them aren't exactly reliable), a bit of heavy anti-tank (your target priority will need to be spot on I'm afraid) and some light anti-tank and/or anti-infantry from the Predators. In objective Missions, try to stick the objectives in your opponents deployment zone as that's where most of your army will be heading anyway.
The Lesser Daemons use Kharns Personal Icon to appear so make sure he doesn't die before they appear. Their main purpose is to give Kharn some scoring ablative wounds so he can dump his squad and still get some shit done without one lucky hit insta-killing him from across the table.

There's ten points left that you can use for some Melta-bombs or another Icon or two if your that worried about the appearance location of a handful of Lesser Daemons.

Thoughts and comments are (as usual) most welcome.

Monday, 3 October 2011

Primarchs - Mortarion

Yes, I've finally stopped pissing about trying to convince the internet that competitive gaming can be fun (just for a bit anyway) and am about to short-circuit my own argument by creating rules for another Primarch that would be impossible to use outside of an Apocalypse game.....Surely my hypocrisy knows no limitations, lol.

Anyway,

Mortarion's 'Incubator' landed on the planet of Barbarus who's atmosphere ranged from completely poisonous to only almost completely poisonous and was ruled by an (as yet) undefined race of superhuman Warlords with undead for servants.*

*Yes your right. It appears that Barbarus wasn't entirely sure what gaming system it should be in and was apparently pencilled in for a Vampire Counts supplement and got put in the 40K pile by accident, lol.

Mortarion was discovered by one of these Vampire Counts Warlords and raised as the son he never had. Just as a precaution though the Vampire Warlord moved his Gothic Castle fortress to higher in the atmosphere than Mortarion could breathe. After fighting alongside these Zombies and Ghouls generic undead and daemonic creatures for a while Mortarion decided to have a closer look at the people at the bottom of the social heap and realised he had far more in common with them than the Vampires Warlords he'd been hanging with up to this point.

Understandably the Humans were a bit suspicious of the poison drinking ten foot tall god that had decided to settle with them but after a quick session of Vampire Warlord slaying they excepted him as one of them. Having the instinctive knowledge of warfare seemingly encoded into all the Primarchs (with the possible exception of Lorgar) combined with the training he'd received from Dracula/Von Carstein the most powerful Warlord enabled him to begin to turn the tide against their oppressors. He taught the blacksmiths how to make primitive (but increasingly sophisticated) breathing apparatus in order to bring the fight direct to the Vampires Warlords Gothic Castles Fortresses until only Dracula/Von Carstein  the most powerful Warlord remained. Round about then the Emperor turned up and in in his usual style made Mortarion feel inadequate killed his enemy for him and generally sowed the seed for betrayal from day one**.

** The Imperium would be a much nicer place to live in the 40th millennium if only the Emperor had employed at least one advisor who had the balls to say "What the fuck are you doing it that way for..." once in a while.

Now onto the bits of background that mean something when working out our stat-line and equipment,

Well he was tall and thin but due to the fact that he ate and drank poison we'll presume that it doesn't effect his toughness level in a detrimental way, so above (Primarch) average toughness seems like a good idea and it also would seem to show that weapons with the 'Poison' rule wouldn't have anywhere near as much of an effect on him as people would hope. He wore a collar around his neck that constantly emitted wisps of poisonous air so we can extrapolate from that that standing right next to him wasn't particularly comfortable either. He also carried Censers that contained atmosphere from his Home-world of Barbarus that I'm thinking would make interesting grenades. He had the expected ornate armour that will have the same rules as all the other Primarchs armour so far and was also most typically armed with two very distinctive weapons. The first was an energy pistol called the Lantern and the Signature Deathguard weapon known as Manreapers which are to all intents and purposes Power Scythes (Till they start messing around with Daemons that is). The stats for the Manreaper are fairly easy to calculate but I can't find any reference to his actually firing 'Lantern' so I'll just make that up completely ;-)

I'm also going to have to include stats for his pair of bodyguards as the background clearly states that they're never more than 49 paces away from him. They also carry Manreapers (though presumably of a lesser scale) and have ornate (Artificer, probably) Armour. These guys were going to have a compulsory points cost as though I stated that Primarchs were really only designed to be used against others and therefore wouldn't have a points cost giving Mortarions player the equivalent of two Space Marine Captains for free seemed a little unfair, however on further thought I decided that Mortarion has less of the flashy special rules than other Primarchs I've done so he gets them for free anyway.

The 'Feel no Pain' Debate.
I'm not giving the non-daemonic version of Mortarion the Feel no Pain special rule as I'll save it for the Daemonic version I'll do in the future. I just don't think it's particularly appropriate is all...If you disagree feel free to add it...it's your game after all. Also as Mortarion wasn't elevated to the rank of Daemon Prince until after the siege of Terra but his Legion was turned into 'Plague marines' before then, it's entirely viable to use this version of Mortarion with 'normal' Marines or Death Guard depending on when your battle is set.

Okay then,

Mortarion, Primarch of the Death Guard.



WS 7, BS 6, S 6 (8), T 7, W 6, I 5, A 5, Ld. 10, Save 1+/3+inv.

Composition : 1 (Unique)
Unit Type : Infantry

Wargear:
Censers of Barbarus*, Lantern**, Manreaper***, Primarch Armour.


* Censers of Barbarus - These Globes of Brass are carried by Mortarion at all times and contain the most deadly of the toxins and poisons from Mortarions homeworld of Barbarus - Mortarion counts as having both Defensive and Assault Grenades.

** Lantern - A huge, hand crafted Energy Pistol of Shenlongi design - The Lantern is a Pistol with the following stats. Range 18", Strength 7, AP 1, Assault 1.

*** Manreaper - A Giant Scythe crafted to be balanced perfectly for it's chosen wielder - Counts as a Master Crafted Relic Blade (Strength increase already included in Mortarions Profile).


Special Rules:
Acute Senses, And They Shall Know No Fear, Eternal Warrior, Immunity to Poison*, Independent Character, Master of Infantry Tactics**, Might of the Primarch, Relentless, The 'Deathshroud'***, Will of the Primarch.

* Immunity to Poison - Mortarion has lived with toxins in his lungs and poisons in his bloodstream since his earliest years on Barbarus. The mundane toxins of other races mean little to him and his enhanced physiology - Any weapon used against Mortarion with the 'Poison' special rule lowers it's effectiveness by two. For example - A Poisoned weapon that wounded on 4's would require 6's to wound Mortarion, a poison weapon that wounded on 3's would be reduced to 5's and so on. Therefore a poisoned weapon that requires a 5 or more to wound has absolutely no effect on the Death Guard Primarch at all.....

** Mastery of Infantry Tactics - Mortarion and by extension his Legion scorn the use of Armour preferring to close with the enemy in waves of unstoppable infantry - All Death Guard Troops (regardless of the codex you are using to represent them) gain the Relentless Special rule. Death Guard selected from any other Force Organisation chart slot however do not.

*** The 'Deathshroud' - These pair of Bodyguards are declared 'Killed in Action' and wear masks at all times so that only Mortarion himself knows their true identities. They wear ornate armour of the highest quality and carry Manreapers of the same style as their lord and master. By ancient tradition they are never more than 49 paces away from their master.

The Deathshroud.





WS 6, BS 5, S 4 (6), T 4, W 3, I 5, A 4, Ld. 10, Save 2+/4+inv.

Wargear : Artificer Armour, Manreaper, Frag and Krak grenades.

Special Rules : 49 Paces*, Chosen of Mortarion**, Fearless, Independent Character, Invulnerable Save (4+).

* 49 Paces - For reasons lost to antiquity the two members of the Deathshroud may never be more than 49 paces from their Lord - The Deathshroud must always be in the same unit as Mortarion but otherwise have all the normal usual rules that apply to Independent Characters. Any event, special rule or psychic power that would force the Deathshroud to leave Mortarions unit are completely ignored.....Only in death does a member of the Deathshroud leave their master...

** Chosen of Mortarion - The Deathshroud share their Lords 'Immunity to Poison' Special rule.


Strategic Assets:
Mortarions's controlling player gains one of each of the following Strategic assets though they may ONLY be used by Mortarion or Death Guard units.

Tactical Assets - Careful Planning, Flank March, Recon.
Front Line Assets - Supreme Headquarters.
Support Assets - Anti-Plant Barrage, Blind Barrage.

Not sure how well this one will be received but as usual thoughts and comments are most welcome.
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